Fangirls who are sugar high
L33tly 'Sueing o'er the Pit
To our concrit they reply:
"If u dont liek, dont reed it!!!!"

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By Tolkien, we charge thee!

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Veni, vidi, vici!

Suethors, why debauchery?
Why the canons' angst prolong?
Ruthless is our mockery
So, get Spock out of that thong!

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Sue's a peerless fighter?

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With our logic smite her!

Come to us, the PPC
If Sparrow has One True Love
Bad slash? —Not in our RC!
Commas, pelt her from above!

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Will's tears are not crystals!

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Meet our pair of pistols!

Sue in Frodo's bed has laid
Her, canons are forced to praise
O Eru, lend us your aid
While we bows and arrows raise!

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So, think you're immortal?

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Tell that to the Void portal!