Here comes Mary Sue
Here comes Mary Sue
Right down fanfic-net lane
She's got pink hair and speshul eyes
To warp canon again
Bells are ringing, Sue is singing
Pop songs in Rivendell
Grab a sword and a charge list
And a candle, book, and bell.

Here comes Mary Sue
Here comes Mary Sue
Why aren't you impressed???
She's a rebel who'll dye her hair
And refuse to wear a dress!
Leggy falls for her "clever charms" —
What a sickening sight
Facepalm now, and take some Bleeprin,
For it will get worse tonight.

Here comes Mary Sue
Here comes Mary Sue
Tenth Walker supreme
A trained assassin, slaying Ringwraiths,
Who has prophetic dreams!
Mary knows that she's a Maia
That makes everything right
Fill your hearts with vengeful cheer,
'Cause Mary Sue dies tonight.

'Cause we'll kill the Sue tonight!