Welcome to the Archive! I'm Neshomeh, and this is where I put all my PPC stories and other related writing. Here's where you'll find the tales of Agents Supernumerary and Ilraen of Response Center 999, Agent Derik and his partners of Response Center 1110, and the nurses and patients of the Department of Fictional Psychology. I also host Phobos' PPC stuff here—I dragged him into this, and he did marry me, so it's the least I can do!

Here you'll also find the PPC Holiday Songbook, some reference pages from the PPC Handbook, and a few other miscellaneous odds and ends.

No idea what I'm talking about? No problem! Just keep reading.

What Is the PPC?

PPC stands for "Protectors of the Plot Continuum." It was originally a 26-chapter story written serially by Jay and Acacia in 2002 and early 2003, after the release of the first Lord of the Rings film in December 2001 caused a massive spike in LotR fanfiction—most of it poorly written and showing little to no understanding of J.R.R. Tolkien's world and characters. "Protectors of the Plot Continuum" also refers to the fictional organization featured in the series, which sends agents into Middle-earth and other worlds to protect them from the negative effects of bad writing, which can range from silly apparitions caused by typos, to native ("canon") characters acting out of character, to the warping of the world's physical laws.

Jay and Acacia started writing the PPC as a way to take their frustration with all the bad stories and, with the addition of a healthy dose of humor, turn it into something entertaining. They attracted a following of like-minded fans, many of whom wanted to write their own PPC stories, and the PPC community was born.

Jay and Acacia's story is usually referred to as the Original Series. Stories written by members of the fan community are called spin-offs. Each PPC series follows the adventures of a different set of agents in one of the organization's various departments. Each chapter sends the agents into a fictional world as affected by a different bad fanfic. The agents must observe (and put up with) the negative effects as the fanfic plays out and struggle to stay sane long enough to compile a charge list and remove any offending non-native ("original") characters and other fanwriter creations.

The PPC has been around for more than a decade now, and it's built up quite a lot of history, in-jokes, and odd little quirks. If this is your first venture into the labyrinthine corridors of Headquarters, I recommend that you stop and read the Original Series first, or at least keep the PPC Wiki open in another tab so you can look up anything you don't recognize. It should help—and if it doesn't, let me know! I'm an admin and a devoted editor, and I always want to make it better.

Who Is Neshomeh?

That would be me. I'm your lovely webmistress and the creator of most of the content on this site. Stuff that wasn't written/drawn/otherwise made by me will be clearly marked as such.

In a nutshell, I'm a married college graduate with a B.A. in English. I currently live in a very tiny apartment in Chicago with my husband and fellow PPCer, Phobos, and my cat, Merlin. I love tea and cats, and of course I love writing. I'm a huge fan of The Lord of the Rings and J.R.R. Tolkien in general, and I've always had a knack for the nitty-gritty rules of spelling, punctuation, and grammar. While many people may find it easy to read what was intended, I tend to see what's actually on the page, and I get distracted by mechanical errors, malapropisms, and flawed logic. I also can't help but laugh when these mistakes are funny. I don't hate people who write badly and I don't set out to hurt anyone's feelings, but I do think it's fair to laugh—and invite others to laugh—when I come across lines like "Very relieved am I to know you are very much undead" or "[the blood] tasted as refreshing as a lemonade Capri-Sun." If you like Mystery Science Theater 3000 or feel a sense of satisfaction when the judges go off on the terrible acts in your favorite reality TV competition, you probably get the idea.

I've been a member of the PPC since about mid-2003. I don't remember exactly when I joined, but I know that I got there through "The Official Fanfiction University of Middle-earth" by Camilla Sandman. From there, joining the PPC was a natural step, and they haven't been able to get rid of me since.

For more information, please see my profile on PPC Wiki.

Disclaimers and Other Legal Stuff

The Protectors of the Plot Continuum (PPC) is the brainchild of Jay and Acacia. They have since left it in the care of members of the PPC Posting Board, and it is used here with their (the Boarders') permission. All PPC characters and concepts that have not originated from me are used here with the explicit or implicit consent of their creator(s).

Unless otherwise specified, characters and concepts originating from me are my intellectual property and may not be used without my explicit consent.

All copyrighted works cited or otherwise referenced on this website are the property of their creators and/or copyright holders. No infringement is intended and no money is being made by their use.

All works of fanfiction parodied on this website belong to their original writers and are cited in a manner consistent with the terms of Fair Use.

The portal background image was made from stock by TexelGirl-Stock (Heather Miller).

Response Center 999

Response Center 999 is home to Agents Supernumerary and Ilraen of the Department of Implausible Crossovers.

Response Center 1110

Response Center 1110 features stories about Agent Derik, his first partner Earwig Slugthrower, and his second partner, Gall Knutson. They work in the Department of Mary Sues.

The Department of Fictional Psychology

This section collects stories by me and others featuring FicPsych and its personnel.

Phobos' Lair

The stories in this section are all written by Phobos, featuring Agents Eamon Brightbeard and Barid of the All-Purpose Department, World of Warcraft Division; Agent Decima of the Department of Bad Slash; unwilling recruit Phobos; and Durotar and Kur'nak of the Postal Department. Phobos' Lair is also home to the Catastrophe Theory series.

Character Profiles

Descriptions of many of the agents and other characters featuring in the spin-offs can be found here.

Basic Charge List for Pern

This is a variant of the PPC Basic Charge List intended to address issues specific to Anne McCaffrey's Dragonriders of Pern series. (In reality it's not all that different, though.)

Substance Menu v. 2.0

This is an updated version of the original List of Edible & Semi-Edible Substances compiled by Claudia Beth King. It's gotten a bit outdated itself now, though.

Useful Technology

A glossary of gadgets, gizmos, and other gee-whizzery used by the PPC.

The (Plot)Hole-ish Adventures of Cameo and Supernumerary

This pseudo-spin-off tells the exploits of Nume and Cameo in the form of Fill the Plothole entries.

Role-play Logs

This section contains transcripts of role-plays that I was involved in and felt were worth saving.

Department of Mary Sues, Legacy of Kain Division

This was going to be a spin-off by my friend Phoenix, but unfortunately it never got off the ground.

The PPC Role-playing Game

A PPC RPG would be cool, right? I tried to make one for D&D 3.5 in college, but abandoned it when I realized there are better systems out there.

The PPC Holiday Songbook

The Holiday Songbook collects filks of various Christmas, Hanuka, and other winter-seasonal songs by PPC Boarders.

"The Fangirl Song"

A filk of "The Witch Song."

"An Anthem for Fireworks"

A filk of "O Say Can You See?"

"Mary Sue: The Musical" - Lyrics

A transcription I made of the song "Mary Sue: The Musical" by Holly Toadstool.

PPC: The Original Series

Exactly what it says on the tin: "The Protectors of the Plot Continuum" by Jay and Acacia is the original PPC series, upon which all this is based. If you love the PPC, if you love The Lord of the Rings, TOS is a must-read.

PPC Posting Board

This is the beating heart of the PPC. It's where we hang out, chat, share our stories, laugh at bad ones, ask questions, and have fun. Come and say hi!

PPC Wiki

If you're not familiar with the PPC, the wiki is an indispensable tool for learning unfamiliar terms and finding links to more material. I personally spend a lot of time trying to make it as useful as possible.

PPC: The Lost Tales

I launched this website to host PPC works that would otherwise have been lost when GeoCities shut down. It has since grown to host the complete Original Series and several spin-offs from other sites that have gone down.